(note: This came to me in rather a profound flash. I had wondered why I was – am – so interested in Russia, as a whole and as a people – and at the individual person level. And why I chose to go there. I’m shaking now – not from fear or anxiety. I’m not sure why. Maybe just a delayed response to the cold. But this is what I thought about on my walk tonight. The “law” thing is something I’ve been thinking about… practicing contract law in places where there really isn’t any such thing yet.)
“Maybe this is just because I was raised by people of a higher psychoclass… like, self-aggrandizement or something because I function on a higher level than they do. But I don’t think so. The truth is… they just have no spirit. It’s been bred – beaten – out of them. The subway cars are really like animal cars. They sit there like animals. Or… no. No. The problem is that they sit there, but not passively. Every one of them seems to be actively scanning the other people there. Taking in their clothes, their hair, makeup – their status, basically. And behind that is the implicit question “Are you going to hurt me?” – which always gets answered in the positive. That’s the problem.
“When I was a teenager I used to compliment myself – or think it might be nice to be able to compliment myself – on having no essential self. Which I saw as making me adaptive to any and every situation. Without realizing, of course, that it is only the people who HAVE an essential self who are – or can be – adaptive. The people in Moscow are the ones who really have no essential selves. Whole train cars – whole cities – full of them. Full of people who go around terrorized constantly functioning at the level of “Are you my friend or my enemy” – without knowing how to deal with people who are their friends, because they’ve never met any. Because it’s not even possible to meet any. These are the people with no essential selves. Which is why Russia can’t survive – won’t survive – because… people of that psychoclass who can’t adapt just… perish. Like Neanderthal man gave way to Homo erectus. Because they couldn’t evolve.
“So there’s the lesson. Here’s the lesson of Russia: here’s what we missed out on. Here’s what we’ve come up from – together. Here’s what we should be damned glad we can’t compliment ourselves on being. It’s not possible to change Russia… but seeing what that does on a societal level… doesn’t it make you want to improve? Not to go practice law there – or go bring laws into the places where there aren’t any – because it’s not happening. You know? Those interesting problems to solve… well, isn’t it those social institutions we want to get rid of in the first place? With the government as the arbiter of contracts?”
